Absent Minded Muser

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Flop and Flip

on November 30, 2010

At the beginning of this year, many people were excited for a bunch of movies that were less than appealing. All the fanatics went out and bought tickets early and waited for hours spending millions just to get a 3D ticket and watch a movie that would be less than perfect.  I’m sure, we (fans of all movies) are highly disappointed when our favorite books/TV shows/comics get cramped in style by the horrible producers and directors in Hollywood as they try to make big names for themselves that leave them swimming in a pool of debt and fans who just want blood (might as well gather these blood-thirsty fans and make a new Friday the 13th with Vampires, wouldn’t that be a challenge for that serial killer?)

I’ve decided to make a list of some of the biggest flops by my standards and some of the ones people thought would be flops but actually were flips (good or epic films that turned out better than people thought) Lets begin at the beginning of 2010…

FLIP- Jan. 8, Daybreakers – With all these vampire crazed people running around, its no wonder that a film like this was made. There is plenty of action and blood to spare, the actors were good (better than some other vampires I’ve seen) and the story *gasp* actually had a plot-point! Who knew?! Coming personally, I enjoyed the bloody-mayhem that ensued and sure some stuff was cheesy, but in a bloody and enjoyable way. I just hope no on shelled out $15 for theater tickets on this film.

Half- Flip- Jan. 8, Leap Year – I just recently saw this on DVD and I have to tell you…I saw NO advertising for this film, so I figured it would be a huge flop. Well, it turns out it was a half-flip. The actress is actually someone I like and even though the film was everything I expected (I mean the cliches and all the goodness that comes with them) it was fairly decent. If you are into romantic-comedy, even though you know the MAIN plot, girl likes guy, guy only wants girl for some reason or another other guy comes along, something happens…girl falls in love with other guy, other guy has an angst ridden problem or something- The end. So, it was a half-flip, pretty good, but could have been better.

Half-Flop- Jan. 15, The Book of Eli – This movie was something I looked forward too, don’t get me wrong, I don’t go to theaters unless I’m DYING to see the film and this one, quite honestly, I wasn’t. I waited for DVD like I usually do. It was good, the story was amazing and I didn’t realize Eli was actually blind. For those of you who haven’t seen this film, go see it. Its morbid, but in a good end-of-the-world-way. All in All, I was a little disappointed. But, I guess the fans liked it…?

FLOP- Jan. 15, The Spy Next Door – Oh my gosh, we have seen some cheese films with Jackie Chan, but this, this takes one of the cakes for recent films of his. The nonstop cheesetasticness was so hard to bear, I almost turned it off and walked away. The ending was O.K. but the whole rest of the film was one sucker-punch to the next. Sorry Jackie, I love you and all, but I give this film two thumbs down. Total Flop.

Half-flop- Jan. 22, Extraordinary Measures – Ok, I love Harrison Ford just like all the other guys and don’t get me wrong he was good, but next to poor fat Brendan Fraser (who really let himself go by the way) it was almost sad. Harrison Ford acted greatly, but got little in return from his second in command, Brendan.  Somehow, Brendan made a GREAT mummy hunter in the First Two Mummy movies (don’t get me started on the third) and then…whoa! What happened to him? The movie, however, was good and since it was based on a real story it was even better, though it was…truthfully, slightly boring to watch. It was a half-flop.

FLOP – Jan. 22, Tooth Fairy – Good gosh, Dwayne Johnson has played in some whack-a-doo movies, but this is by far the whack-a-dooeist. He just can’t keep himself from those corny-lines and silly outfits. Sure it was enjoyable for kids, but even if I were a kid I would have seen all the cheese and horrible lines coming. Yes, it was all truly predictable. Sorry Dwayne, you should try something else.

Flip- Jan. 29, When in Rome – Oh man!! Talk about a movie you thought would be a flop! The ending, well… I didn’t really see that coming. Haha, who knew it would be the priest? I didn’t. I saw this movie as a flop, something I would just…laugh off and be done with. But, surprisingly enough, it gave me a tiny shock. The actors were pretty fantastic with their comedy and though I almost puke when that guy stripped off his shirt in the cafe, it was a really good heart-warming film with actors who knew exactly how to use their lines.

Half-Flop – Feb. 5, Dear John – For those of you who loved and I do mean, loved the Notebook, this is truly a good movie. The young actress and actor make quite a pair and sure sometimes the emotions seem forced, the story was good (thanks to the original book). they delivered their lines without many flaws and made the film enjoyable. I give it Four Stars.

FLOP – Feb. 12, Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief – Well, all you little kids and teens who adored the books, get ready for the BIGGEST flop so far on the list, this movie was horrible, as soon as it started I knew it was going to suck big time! I’m surprised no one “booed” at the screen. It was boring, the action was terrible, the actors were atrocious and everything was so messed up from the books it was hard to see the POINT of the film.  Thankfully, I can say, I doubt there will be a sequel to the monstrosity. Stick to the books, and Rick Riordan, don’t let anyone who filmed the first two Harry Potters do your movies again.  This was just a sad, sad, sad film. Ten minutes until the end of the film, I was so bored I just wanted to pee and get out of the theater.

Flop- Feb. 12, Valentines day – Yes, it is as horrible as your neighbors-sisters-cousins-best friend said it was. There were some great actors in this film to and yes, it was like watching a train wreck. Granted, the little boy was adorable, but I think that was all. It was pathetic and I’m so sorry for Taylor Swift. I think she is the only person I feel sorry for.

FLOP – Feb. 26, Cop Out – From the trailers, this looks like a good movie, but when you actually see it, all you want to do is run. For those of you who enjoyed this film… I won’t say anything. There were a few good quotes and some memorable moments, but other than that, I’ve never been more ashamed to see Bruce Willis on the screen. Good gosh was was he thinking?  I guess he wasn’t as cool as I always thought he was. Hrm… flop.

March 5, Alice in Wonderland – It was everything I had hoped and more. The twist to this film was awesome and the adult Alice is much more tolerable than the child, even though I adore Lewis Carroll’s book, Alice is admittedly a brat. Alice comes to terms with adulthood in this film, making choices that (without Underland) would never have been made. The voices and animation were so fantastic that I wanted to see it twice, only at the time I was broke. I did however, shell out for 3D tickets on this film because well, it seemed worth it (it wasn’t IMAX so I was disappointed) But the rest of it was good and Johnny Depp (as always) was amazing to watch. Tim Burton has created another masterpiece out of a timeless classic. Bravo!

Half-Flop – March 12, Remember Me – Our pale vampire transforms into a normal smoking drinking human being, who at all times seems drugged. Except for when he meets the main girl in the film. Some people might love this film because its based on Sept. 11, but honestly, Robert Pattinson is not as hot as he thinks he is, *ducks the fangirls* in fact, I liked his acting better in this film than in the Twilight Saga. I give this movie two stars. It was good, but it could have been better.

Half-Flop – March 19, The Bounty Hunter – Who doesn’t love Jennifer Aniston and Gerard Butler? They make quite the hilarious pair in this movie that was sort’ve a half-flip. It was good, no doubt, but there were really annoying side-characters I wanted to kick in the face.  The comedy was well-timed and the struggle between the two was simply hilarious. Three Stars.

FLOP – The Runaways was a terrible film. That is all.

Half-Flop – March 26, How to Train your Dragon – Good, actually, it was of course a child’s movie, but it was good. Despite the fact that I cannot stand Jay Baruchel’s voice because it is so darn squeaky and makes you want to send a dog after it, he played the voice of Hiccup well. The movie was enjoyable and its good for people of all ages.

Half-Flop – March 31, The Last Song – …We all know Miley Cyrus as Hannah Montana the annoying little pop-star who gets her way no matter what. Well, as it turns out, Miley is a fairly decent actress, though I’d say she needs to train more. At best she gets two stars, because some times her emotions weren’t conveyed very well and were forced. Sadly, that destroyed most of the film and her leading man was O.K., he gets three stars. This film had a good point but it wasn’t that good.

FLIP – April 2, Clash of the Titans – Opened in 3,777 theaters! That’s an amazing number. I thought this movie would stink, but guess what? For fans of the Percy Jackson books, it was like watching an old time Percy (since he is named Perseus) in action! 10 out of 10 for acting and graphics. They did an amazing job making everything believable, so it was a Flip! I also hear there will be a sequel for those of you who loved this movie.

FLOP – April 30, Furry Vengeance – Oh..my…Gosh. As I mention early, Brendan Fraser REALLY let himself go, in weight and in acting. Now, I’m no model, but that…that is just sad. The acting was terrible, though when the teenage son screams at his dad, that made me laugh. Otherwise, it was hard to take and I just wanted to stop watching it.

April 30, A Nightmare on Elmstreet – I haven’t seen this yet, but since it is a horror film that actually looks pretty interesting, I might. I’ve always been interested in Freddy Krueger

Half-Flop – May 7, Iron Man 2 – Tony Stark returns in this sequel full of surprises and turns. I was expecting more from this film, since the first one was really good. Sure it was enjoyable enough, but I’m sure all the comic-book fans hated this movie.  The acting was good and I must say I enjoyed Gwyneth Paltrow (Pepper) performance the most. It was a half-flop.

Half-Flop – May 14, Letters to Juliet – Oh, good film. The acting was really good and the story was adorable. I laughed so hard at some points in the movie that I fell off the couch. It might have been all the caffeine I was consuming during the movie… at any rate, I watched it twice and the second time around it wasn’t so funny, but still a good an enjoyable film with funny leads and great lines.

Also opening was Robin Hood – Starring Russell Crowe, I like him as an actor, I loved him in Gladiator, which by the way, I’ve been at least 6 times. This film, however, was good but not awesome. It showed a darker and more realistic side to the classic tale, a side that no one has dared to touch until now. I give it four stars.

Flip – May 28, Prince of Persia: The sands of time – I’m running this a bit long, so I’ll just say that the actors were good and the graphics were great. But they didn’t follow the video-game’s storyline well so… I give it Four Stars.

Flip – June 11, The Karate Kid – Jackie Chan takes a step up from his earlier flop, where in this movie he stars along side; Jaden Smith, a talented little kid if I ever saw one. The acting…at some points seemed a bit forced and I did admittedly get a bit bored. But I liked it, being a lover of the old Karate Kids, this was a good and heartwarming film.

Half-Flop – June 18, Toy Story 3 – Well, what can I say about it? It was good, sure, the actors were hilarious yes, but why did they feel the need to take away Bo Peep? She could have been given to the little girl at the end and Woody could have been with her again? This movie made me cry, I loved the first two and quite honestly, was annoyed that they even bothered making a third (best part of the film is when Buzz turns Spanish!!)

Flopish – June 30, Eclipse – …Um, to avoid being maimed by fans … I think I’ll just say, the acting has improved.

MAJOR FLOP – July 1, The Last Airbender – Ok, the titled…messed up, thanks to our Blue Alien friends who ruined any chances of keeping ‘Avatar’ the fans were stuck with this crap title, that no one knows or seems to care about. Before the film even hit theaters people who reviewed it basically said it was a suck-fest. And I’m in agreement after seeing it. I was in love with the TV show until they totally screwed up the ending and just left you with so many holes in the plot lines that you just wanted to kill Mike and Bryan, forget the pairing battle, the storyline was murdered and no one but the fans called foul. This movie, was a tragedy… I painfully sat through…what? An Hour and a half of the worst acting, crude  graphics (the fire looked like it was drifting no FLYING through the air) and just nonstop corniness. Not to mention that when they were trying to be serious I just laughed. Plus, Ozai the Fire Lord was more like General Zhao from the cartoon. Um… WTHECK!? Plus they were saying all the names wrong, really guys? You replaced ‘A’ with ‘O’? that’s just sad. Hey, Shamwow! Go back to directing school!

July 9, Despicable Me and Predators – They were both good films and hugely different. Despicable me was for children, it was good in a cute kiddy way and Predators was awesome in an old-school bloody film way.

Half-Flop – July 14, The Sorcerers Apprentice – First off, that’s Mickey’s title, second off… the only good actor was Nicholas Cage and he had to be good because he has been in some real stinkers recently. However, Jay returns with his squeaky-toy voice and ruins the whole movie… ah.. man, did you ever hit puberty?

Flip – Aug. 13, Eat. Pray. Love. – Not only was this film like watching my own mother make the mistakes, it was enjoyable and should be seen by all woman struggling to get romance when all they really need to do is find themselves. Granted we won’t all get a guru guide, but we do get something better if we look and that’s God.  A good and touching film was was well worth the buck I paid to rent it.

Flopish – Aug. 13, the Expendables – Oh man, I was expecting epic-ness out of my ears…well, I watched it last night and it was O.K. but I really just wanted to sleep.

Sept. 24, Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga’Hoole – Based on some wonderful books. The graphics in this movie were astounding! I just wanted to hug every single Owl I saw. Good for children and adults.

Oct. 15, RED – …so far, one of the best films I’ve seen all year. I went to the theater TWICE to see it, not only for the story but for the commercials that came with it. Bruce Willis relives his awesomeness in this hilarious Action Comedy that really makes you want to see it, again and again.

Nov. 19, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1 – Ah, another epic film down! It sticks pretty closely to the books and goes smoothly in transition. Nothing much else to say but that I can’t wait for the next part.

Well, that’s all I have (as everyone breathes a sigh of relief) Most of these were FLOPS. But I’m happy to announce that all the good ones were Flips. Thanks for reading~


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